I've tried all the pills all the people all the teams and clubs and classes I've tried the time away from work and home running dancing drinking I've tried shutting off and out I've tried opening up and in I've tried pretend and hope I've tried eating and not eating hitting and pushing and shoving and not one thing moves me to somewhere else today I don't try I'm done I'm over I'm alive because my dog is here I'm alive because I have that kid expecting to see me on Friday. I'm alive because I haven't been killed or murdered or I'm alive because I'm not dead. I've tried to be alive I've tried to not be dead.